I haven’t posted a blog in a few weeks. I’m sure that both of my readers have wondered where I’ve been! We’ve decided to move and every spare minute has been devoted to packing up the things worth keeping and getting rid of the rest. The more time I spend on “the rest” the more I wonder why I’ve had it all this time. As moving day approaches, I have to become less sentimental and more practical about what stays and what goes.
When we got married, fifteen years ago, I moved into my husband’s house and sold mine. With two fully furnished houses, you can imagine how much stuff we had. The bulk of my stuff was boxed up and put in a storage shed, never to be thought about again. Now I’m sifting through it all. Let me tell you the kinds of things I held onto all this time…
A whole box of clothes that didn’t fit me when I moved here but I hung on to them, waiting for the day that I’d magically lose weight. I have heard that weight loss is a real-life possibility. I’ve read about it and I’ve seen it on tv.
“No dieting or exercise and she lost 17 inches!” This is code for “she lost one inch but we measured her in 17 places and added them up.”
Weight loss may be a reality for some, but it doesn’t happen to me. So, the clothes have to go. If I had donated the skinny clothes when they first became too skinny, someone could have acquired some nice stylish clothes. But now I’ll have to donate them to a museum of 90s fashion.
It wasn’t hard to get rid of the skinny clothes, but I can’t part with my daughters’ drawings from elementary school. Or the toys that kept them busy and playing together for hours. Or their favorite books that they couldn’t put down. Or the little pink dress they each wore home from the hospital. Or their little baby blankets. Or their jerseys from the various sports they played. I’ll pack these things and move them with me one more time – using the excuse that I’m saving them for my grandchildren. I know my non-existent granddaughter well enough to know that she would love to have a glow-in-the-dark American Girl sleeping bag.
If I don’t get grandchildren, then my daughters will have to decide what to do with all of their old things when I die. That’s what they get for not giving me grandchildren!
Every Disney Movie Ever Made on VHS
Why did I store these treasures in the hottest place on Earth?! I don’t know if they’ll still play. I can’t put them in the VCR to find out if they work, because it could ruin it, And where would I find another VCR in 2017? I don’t want to part with them because they represent the countless hours my kids and I spent watching them. Maybe I could borrow your VCR to see if they still play.
As I went through each box, determining the value of their load, I found things that never should have made their way in. Grocery receipts. Old calendars. And why do I still have one of these?
The Boyfriend Box
The saddest part of my purging adventure in the shed was finding The Boyfriend Box. This box contained everything that every boyfriend gave me during the eight years I was single. Three boyfriends, one box, no bigger than a half a loaf of bread. It’s sad that it all fit in such a tiny box. There were letters and cards, movie tickets, a watch case, a few good memories and a whole lotta lies. That box went directly to the garbage where it should have gone decades ago.
But don’t let that bring you down. I get to walk out of this storage shed and into the house with the best boyfriend-turned-husband a girl could ask for. We’re moving to our happy place and have many years of happiness ahead of us.